About this age (oooh, the big quarter-century!) we start growing up, really getting to know ourselves, forging careers, pairing off, making big commitments and setting ourselves up for the rest of our lives. People follow their own paths and make different decisions, and of course have different priorities. Mostly, though, lives tend to follow some sort of pattern: school/work/partner/marriage/house/kids. Me, I’m all for the pattern. I’m not one for pushing envelopes. But times change and “the done thing” evolves.
A generation ago, you left school or uni and got a job and bought a house and settled down. You had kids and worked hard. These things were measures not only of success but of the calibre of person you were, and social status was gained by achieving these milestones. These days I feel like ticking off a list of countries is where the social status comes from. Getting married, buying a house, having kids are all postponed because of the idea we have to “live our lives” before settling down (with the implication that once you settle down, your life is over).
What’s frustrating me at the moment is the idea that traditional pursuits are not worthy these days; that we’re not living our lives to the fullest if we’re not spending half of them on planes. I’m sick of being told by my peers that I’m “too young to be settling down” when the world is out there waiting for me. It’s bullshit.
Why are travelling and having a family mutually exclusive? Why can’t we enjoy our youth while still setting ourselves up for the future? And can somebody PLEASE tell me why having kids means putting my life on hold? Last time I checked, children added a wonderful new dimension to life, and the best parents were the ones excited about having children.
Life is life. It takes everyone in different directions. But lets stop the judgement and start supporting each other because hey, next time life hands you a lemon you might need your friends to help you make lemonade.